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the drums.

On 02, Dec 2013 | No Comments | In creating, noticing | By Natalie

This past weekend, something new happened to me. Something, that has never happened before. You want to know? I stood up in front of a room full of lovely people and read something… that I myself wrote. I’ve never done that before, never. The process of preparing and the experience that day was a mind-blowing experience, reminding me that we must struggle, we must create and we must share in community with one another. We must not do it alone. (But more on that another time.)

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very much alive.

On 04, Jun 2013 | One Comment | In creating, noticing | By Natalie


a friend phoned
the other day
and i happened to answer.
{isn’t that a pleasant surprise?}.
well it was.

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she asked the sun.

On 24, Apr 2013 | No Comments | In creating, sharing | By Natalie

And so, she asked the sun,
“Sun, how is it that every day you
are able to shine so bright?”
But the sun did not respond.
And so she asked again,
“Sun, what makes you give off
such heat?”
But again, the sun did not respond.
Discouraged, the girl crosses her arms
across her chess,
turns on her heels,
and begins to march away
down the broken sidewalk.
It is then that the girl sees {and feels} it:
the warmth on her back and
the light on the road ahead.
And the girl thinks,
“My path, ever golden, follows the sun.”
– a poem by my friend written to me
quite some time ago.

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when the words go out

On 13, Jun 2012 | One Comment | In creating, wondering | By Natalie

it’s been a long while
since i’ve headed
to the library
with such intensity
and purpose.

when all around me
there are words
words words

and i discover that
i have nothing left to give
or you.
or actually you either.
or myself.

it’s then that i need to
jump in.
off deep.
swirl and twirl and turn and roll.
flip and glance, skim and read

when all the words go out of me.
there is little to do except keep the
fear away.

and search for connection.

to be with what is.

roaming the aisles
of books
like an impulsive buyer, while
making no commitments that
cannot be kept.

up and down each aisle i go.
car repairs to travel.
chinese to teen fiction.
american history & the ancient wisdoms.

poets and their poems.
design and redecorating.
a children’s book to teach what
really needs
to be known.

an author, just grab all 4 of her books
in order to hear how her voice
might change and grow.

i just need them near.
these words that are not my own.
from room to room
i carry them.
sit them next to me while i work,
while i eat
while i call through the phone.

friends i’ll never know.
but their words they left behind.
they are not mine.
they’re theirs.
if the time is right
our words might grow together.

deep roots.
yet, new branches reaching
further than
either them or i can begin to

and here they sit.
safe with me.
and me with them.
the words.
the words of another.
the words of others.

and so my mind can be calm.
can settle and rest.
just be.
just be.

my words will come again.
not today,
maybe not tomorrow.
but they’ll be back.
because they never left really.
they were just resting.

resting in the work of another.

but for tonight.
i’ll just flip and turn.
peak and skim.
over&over&over again.
slower this time then skip
to the next.

to be with what is.

and that’s what to do
when the words go out of you.

– n.